This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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