Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(205): View more from Alabama

he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.

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(647): View more from Ontario

They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.

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(515): View more from Iowa

in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today

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(931): View more from Tennessee

My bed is full of blood and feathers

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(915): View more from Texas

He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.

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(573): View more from Missouri

So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet

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