is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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