My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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