At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
