Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize