wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
