How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
