My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
