I don't think brook has ever known best
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
