no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
