just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
