The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize