What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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