...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
never play flip cup with pint glasses
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
