I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
