standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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