We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
