I'm gonna have a badass scar
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
