I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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