Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
