Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
