I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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