..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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