Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
