i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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