she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
