But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
