If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize
