We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
