I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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