love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
