I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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