Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
