Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
