So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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