As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
