Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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