she was so not down for the gang bang
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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