dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
