Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
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