Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
home. puking in laundry basket.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I need a burrito and a hug.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
