Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
you have to choose: penises or morals?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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