found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
