I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
