Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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