just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
