I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
When are your genitals available?
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
