I cockslap morals
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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