Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
